So during what I will call a bit of bravery I will share with you all some of the often horrible bits and pieces of poetry. Enjoy and hopefully this doesn't scare you all away.
I pretend not to hurt
As I die inside
Holding back tears
When all I want is to cry
Not letting myself say
What my heart needs to say
Writing the word over and over
As the wind’s refrain
Blows over distant hills
Singing your name
As I die a little more
And ignore the pain
It is I, me, him, he
The one who wishes to be
The one who you, her, she
Holds at night
The one that you
Hold, hug, and kiss
The one that gives you bliss
It is I, me, him, he
The one who wishes to be
That one that gives
You everything
My love for you lies somewhere deep within my soul. Somewhere in its boundless wonder my soul decided to embrace your beauty. My love for you lies somewhere between Unrelenting Passion and Tragedy, A passion is unrelenting that at the mere sight of you or the mention of your name excites in me feelings that long to be expressed, a feeling that I haven’t felt for a long time. The love I feel eats away at my soul for not confessing it to you. And tragic because true love is tragic in what it does to your heart. Forcing you to step out on the limb and give your heart away, knowing full well that the one you give it to may crush it. Tragic because despite the warmth you feel when in love, the coldness I feel having to watch you walk away. Tragic because to enjoy the feeling that is love you must be crushed.
Lonely are the nights
I can not sleep
Restless are those nights
Without repose
In this bleak heartless world
On nights when owls watch
Their eyes gleaming
In the dark expanse of starlight sky
Those nights when
My thoughts fly
Like midnight birds of prey
Lonelier then angels
Who alone can tell
The ages of the moon
Somewhere a twilight rain falls
Soft as a feather
And almost as invisible as my tears
Again the angel of death comes
For whom dark tears will fall
Angel of death
Who knows no mercy
Who with the crack of thunder
And light of the zigzagging lightening
Starts his return
There or caught up
In the sweet music
Of a lovers tongue
Silent in his arms
I have known
The whispered rumors
Of a new era
Of the sun rising and setting
I have seen death the inevitable
With its heavy black curtains
Closing around me
Taking me into the unknown
The feared, the hoped for
The beginning and the end
I have known myself
The man, the child, the god
With a fiery and searching mind
I have lived a thousand years
Unlocking truths
From ancient tomes
And exploring dusty attics
By golden candlelight
Running barefoot with the wind
Laughing with the face of freedom
Sometimes wearing my emotion
Letting life’s magic in
To stain me with wisdom
Having seen the wonder
Of a rain drop
Or known it by simple being
Longing to give this gift
To those not yet born
Not many of the poems stand out to me because I usually only write the month and year they were written on. The next 2 poems however, do. The first poem has two versions and will forever have a specific place in my memory because it is the first time I kissed a guy. And the feelings that it awoke inside me. It is still crap poetry but this one at least is special.
Is it the subtlety
Of a hand on you cheek
Or is it the passion
Roaring in a lovers eyes
Could it be
The soft thumping
Of you heart
As you inch closer
Your passion the roaring fire
The inferno that engulfs
All it touches
Burning to cinders
All the impurities
Leaving behind only
The silken rose peddle
That is his lips
And the intoxicating aroma
That envelops him
The soft creamy texture
That is his thigh
Beckons you forth
Fueling the passion
Of your embrace
Passions collide
With the power
To make worlds move
Ecstasy erupts
The fire subsides
Leaving two bodies
To burn in the ashes
Is it the subtlety
Of a hand on you cheek
Or is it the passion
Roaring in a lovers eyes
Could it be
The soft thumping
Of you heart
As you inch closer
Your passion the roaring fire
The inferno that engulfs
All it touches
Burning to cinders
All the impurities
Leaving behind only
The silken rose peddle
That is his lips
And the intoxicating aroma
That envelops him
Lips touch
His lips cool
The fire in your soul
Hearts beat in time
Two bodies locked
In a lovers embrace
For all of eternity
And this, the second one is probably the most written about subject ever. Unrequited love.
A love so powerful
It stings the soul
And burns itself
Into your flesh
When all you want
Is to feel
It makes you feel too much
When you sleep at night
And all you dream
Is being close to someone
You know it’s real
It’s really real
When you would die
To make him smile
You would give anything to know
That he feels the same
And you feel that your life is over
When he doesn’t
When a love
Is that powerful
That you would die
To be his all
What do you do
What choice would you make
And could you live with it forever
That is all the crap I will torture you with. I hope that wasn't to painful for you. Thanks again for reading. Feel free to comment, ask questions, whatever. I would love to hear what you have to say.
As always. Thanks for reading.